The first member of the roster should be the head of the household

You could do the same as outlined in the image below:

In the survey tab of your xlsform:

In the choices tab of your xlsform:

Image 102

Data entry screen as seen in Enketo: when a wrong entry is made

Data entry screen as seen in Enketo: when a correct entry is made

Reference xlsform:

Head of the HH.xls (28.5 KB)